How to ask for help, in one easy lesson

Forgive my snarkiness, telling someone “it doesn’t work” is double annoying. It’s like calling the Geek Squad and saying, “my computer doesn’t work”. Captain Obvious would say, "that’s why you call the Geek Squad and not a plumber. " I’ve often wanted to reply to people asking for help with technology, “I’m sorry that has happened, but I only answer calls for temporal-quantum mechanics related issues, not computer ones.”

Now, I’ll try to be more productive, than a major asshole. Just like the Emergency Medical Hologram on Star Trek asks, “please state the nature of the medical emergency” when someone calls him up, rather then tell someone it doesn’t work, describe what it should be doing but instead is doing something else. You could also describe what it is doing but what you want it to do.

Again, sorry for my snarkiness, but it’s just so frustrating that people just act like children when asking for help, “it tastes funny”, “it doesn’t work”, “I can’t find it”, “it’s broken”. Please, put more effort into helping yourself, because, as you can see I’ve put far more effort in my response, for good or bad, and I’m not getting paid to help you, but offer it as my own community service.